


Some Problems Need Out Of The Box Solutions

by IWillNotGoGentlyIntoThatGoodNight (Menochange)



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Batfamily Feels, Big Brother Dick Grayson, Bruce Has Issues, Bruce Wayne is Bad at Feelings, Damian Wayne is Robin, Dick Grayson is Nightwing, Family Fluff, Gen, Time Loop, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-09
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2019-10-25 03:09:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17716904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Menochange/pseuds/IWillNotGoGentlyIntoThatGoodNight
Summary: Time Travel Fic.“Sir. He arrived at the front door and asked to speak to Batman. He claims to be your son”Damian scowled angrily, pulling forcefully away from Dick as he stomped purposefully through the cave towards the door, stopping only to grab his katana on his way out.“Damian” His father called but the boy ignored him swiftly making his way back inside the manor leaving the others to follow hurriedly in his wake before the young boy maimed their guest.





	1. Family Problems

**Author's Note:**

> So I say this every time I start a new story but seriously I known I shouldn't be starting something new with all the stuff I have out (and unfinished ) at the moment but this idea wouldn't leave me so ... enjoy :)
> 
> Oh also the exact timeline of this is very hazy so just go with it :)

“I think we can all agree that Drake is an idiot” Damian sneered derisively at the older boy who was seated across from him. The young boy technically wasn’t supposed to be down in the cave (and as such was in his civilian clothes which was a stark contrast to the others who were each in full gear ready to head out to the streets once everything was sorted) especially since he had been taken off patrol for the foreseeable future – the consequence of some questionable decisions made the night before – but once he had heard about the pre-patrol case meeting nothing could stop the boy from attending as he claimed that despite his current status he was still a part of this investigation.

“Dami, that’s not…” Richard started to intervene only to be cut off by Drake who sat up in his chair a glaring back at the younger teen.

“Awww, is the wittle murder demon just sad that no one wants you in the field after the shit you pulled yesterday?” Tim cooed in a mockingly

“Tim! That was totally uncalled for” Dick reprimanded sternly as he placed his arms around Damian to physically stop him from leaping over the table to attack the older teen.

“Is it though? It’s not my fault the gremlin is more trigger happy than Jason in front of the Joker” Tim sassed back unapologetically.

“Holy shit replacement, did you just… holy shit you did… oh snap” Jason laughed loudly from where he was sprawled across his chair playing with his phone.    

“Jay! You’re not being very helpful” Dick tried to shoot his younger brother a meaningful look only to be ignored.

“Well you see Dickface, I’m not here to be helpful. I’m here to watch this bullshit blow up in everyone’s face and to shoot some bad guys. Fuck everything else” Jason smiled mockingly

“Jay…”Dick sighed exasperated as he wrapped his arms around Damian’s waist and pulled the struggling younger boy closer to him in an attempt to stop fratricide from occurring “B! I could use a little help here.” He called to their father who was sat wilfully ignorant at the bat computer engrossed in his current casefile.

“Jason language” Batman called out absently.

“Fuck you old man” Jason called back amused as Dick spluttered in his spot.

“B! That’s not what I… Seriously?” Dick yelled outraged, glaring so hard at the back of his father’s head that he barely noticed that his little brother had stopped struggling nor the fact that he had wound his arms painfully tight around said brother in anger. “This fucking family is falling apart and you seriously don’t give a shit do you?”

“Errr, maybe you should let go of…” Stephanie started to speak only for her jaw to snap shut as his glare turned dangerously on her before turning back to their father.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now? You asked for our help Bruce. YOU called us all in for this case days ago and now that you think you can do it better without us, we don’t mean shit? Seriously?” Dick raged his words echoing in the now silent cave.

“Innocent people will die if I don’t work this out. If you boys are not ready to be adults then you can leave. When you are ready to put aside your childish grievances and like professionals then you can be back on the case. I don’t need any more distractions or mess ups at this point. The girls and I can do just fine without you” Batman growled at them without a glance away from the computer even as the youngest two batboys hung their faces in shame.

“Seriously? Fuck this I’m fucking out” Jason growled kicking his chair back violently as he got up.

“Jay don’t leave! B.  We started this case together, it’s utter bullshit that you think you can just kick us out. Not only that but it’s also ridiculous that you won’t even give your own family two seconds of your fucking time” Dick ranted angrily getting more and more worked up with every second that went by without a reaction from the older vigilante.

 “Let go.” Cassandra spoke suddenly gaining the attention of the entire room effortlessly

“What?” Jason asked confusion overtaking his anger only to realise that he wasn’t the one she was talking to.

“What?” Dick echoed confused as he realised she was speaking to him.

“Let go. He hurts.”

“Fuck him, if the great batman can’t see what’s right in front of him then maybe… ” Dick started to sneer meanly

“No. Robin” Cass cut him off

“Robin? What?” Dick looked down at the young teen in his arms who seemed to be worrying his lower lip silently. The boy had been so – unnaturally – silent that Dick had honestly forgotten all about him in his anger, which is why it took him so long to realise that his hands were holding onto his baby brother tight enough to bruise. “Fuck, little D. I am so sorry. You should have said something. Fuck” he swore pulling his hands away from the younger boy as though burned.

“It’s fine” The boy spoke stiffly his face blank as he stood somewhat shakily moving back towards his original seat.

“No it’s not. Fuck. Let me look at you” Dick pulled his brother close once again kneeling to get a better look at the boy’s ribs as his pulled up his shirt.

The action illicit startled gasps from Tim and Steph and a murmured fuck from Jason.

Dick admitted it looked bad, the young boy’s torso was mottled with dark purple bruises, and the bandage which had once been tightly wrapped around his chest was loose and blood spotted.

“Holy shit, what the hell did you do?” Steph exclaimed clearly surprised by the damage.

“Don’t be an idiot Brown. Obviously he didn’t do anything. These were sustained last night, a consequence of my… miscalculation last night” the boy replied haltingly.

“Yeah but I did make it worse. I’m sorry little D. I totally forgot. Not that, that’s any excuse. Come on I’ll bandage it back up. Fuck.”

“Master Richard, I understand that you no longer live under this roof but I would still assume that regardless you would choose not to flout such language in front of impressionable minds” Alfred’s dry tone carried across the cave startling most of the rooms occupants (Cassandra and Bruce seemed to be entirely unfazed by the elderly butler’s appearance)

“Alfie, I was just…” Dick trailed off awkwardly unsure sure how to continue

“Indeed. Actually Master Bruce we have a sight situation upstairs that requires immediate attention” Alfred spoke turning to Bruce who growled in response.

“Alfred. I don’t have time for…”

“That’s all well and good Sir, but you have a visitor who was quite insistent about speaking to you.” Alfred cut him off, tone still pleasantly polite but with an undercurrent of steel.

“Tell whoever it is that I am not available at the moment and if they wish to see me that they can set up an appointment via my assistant” Bruce dismissed turning back to the bat computer.

“Sir. He arrived at the front door and asked to speak to Batman. He claims to be your son” the room fell deathly silent for a moment before it exploded with noise. Multiple voices overlapped with the reactions ranging from dark amusement (Jason) to disbelief (Tim and Stephanie) to outright anger (Damian) as they each processed the shocking news.

“ENOUGH” Bruce yelled sending the cave into silence once again “Where?”

“He is currently in the kitchen making tea with Titus, I was hesitant to leave him alone Sir but he was rather… adamant that I could watch him on the video feeds” The butler’s disapproving tone showed exactly what he thought about that (although whether he disapproved of a guest making their own drink or being left unsupervised was anyone’s guess – perhaps it was both)

With a few quick key stokes a clear view of their kitchen was up on display. A medium build green haired boy sat on the floor of the kitchen a cup of tea abandoned on the counter in favour of playing with the great dane who was rolling on the floor like a puppy rather than the trained guard dog her was.

“How the fu- heck? That stupid dog still growls whenever I come around, how the heck did that asshole manage to tame the mutt?” Jason grumbled outraged

“Titus is properly trained to eliminate threats and weed out riffraff. He shouldn’t be… this shouldn’t be happening” Damian bit his lip looking lost for a moment before his face went purposely blank.

It was at that moment that green haired boy looked directly to the camera (as though he knew exactly where they were which should have been near impossible as they were all well-hidden) and smirked waving jauntily at them.

Damian scowled angrily, pulling forcefully away from Dick as he stomped purposefully through the cave towards the door, stopping only to grab his katana on his way out.

“Damian” His father called but the boy ignored him swiftly making his way back inside the manor leaving the others to follow hurriedly in his wake before the young boy maimed their guest.


	2. The Green Haired Demon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mysterious son is finally revealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Guys!  
> So this story may actually be longer than I originally planned so.. Yay?  
>  hope you guys like it. finished the next two chapters so hopefully I can maintain regular updates but for those of you who read my other works you know how I am so I do apologize in advanced (especially because now it's probs gonna be at least 6ish chapters)
> 
> Anyway. hope you like it and thanks all of you for all the support :)

**“** Answer me you swine or I shall be forced to do something that you will regret” Damian as his held his katana menacingly against the green haired boy’s neck “Did my mother send you?”

The older boy just laughed and clapped as though Damian was a puppy preforming a cute trick.

“Damian. Enough.” Bruce ordered as he entered the room, followed soon after by the rest of the family who were all dressed once again in their civilian clothes.

“Father!”

“Hiya Dad”

Both boys turned towards Bruce, one smiling widely and one scowling and the resemblance between the three of them was instantly noticeable.

Bruce frowned as he scanned the boy’s appearance as though he were searching for an explanation. But the green haired teen just smiled wider and hoped up onto his feat deftly avoiding Damian’s sword as he jumped over the kitchen counter and launched himself towards Dick with a theatrical flip.

“Richard! I’ve missed you. Three weeks is super long ya know?” he smiled so wide that he cheeks must have hurt but he continued as he pulled the older man into an enthusiastic hug.

“Ummm… Do I …” Dick started clearly startled by the weirdly familiar contact.

“Oh. Shit sorry. Explanation first. Sometimes I just forget, I blame Jon for all the country boy I have in me ya know? I mean ya don’t know but you will” He turned his head to look over his shoulder winking at Damian even as he continued to hug Dick.

“Wait … are you implying that you’re…” Steph trailed off looking between Damian and their guest.

“Little brother” Cass commented at the same time, smiling slightly.

“Yes. Yes I am.” The teen grinned at her.

“No. No you are not. I would never! Be that…  You’re clearly a clone of some sort, sent by mother to … to… distract us!” Damian interjected outraged as he stormed over to them and physically pulled Dick out of the green lanky teen’s grasp, inserting himself (and his very pointy katana) between them in an apparent attempt to protect his favourite brother’s virtue.

The green haired teen backed up, raising his hands in the air as he laughed “Sorry to disappoint little me but that’s not the case.  This is, well… Us. Aged 17 and two quarters.”

“No. you’re a liar! Father. He’s lying.” Damian yelled and Dick once again wrapped his arms around the younger boy (more gently this time) to keep him from committing self-harm.

“Look you probably don’t wanna hear this but…You should be careful those wounds took us waay longer to heal than usual. If I remember correctly we were nicked in the back by that coward who had stolen some of Ivy’s special mix. It’s not deadly cause she never completed it but you’re gonna feel like shit and be in a whole lot of pain for the next few days.” The boy winced empathetically giving Damian a sympathetic smile. “Anyway… I’ll be around for like the week or so before I have to go… So I figured I’d just crash here, ya know?”

“How do we know you’re telling the truth? Damian’s right you could be a clone sent by the league. So a DNA test wouldn’t work and any information you have could have been supplied by Talia” Tim questioned eyes narrowing suspiciously.

“Hiya Tim” the older Damian waved jauntily at him even though there were less than three feet apart. “It’s true I could be a clone but I’m not. Also I could tell you information that Talia definitely does not know but myself and certain parties have brokered deals on such information to keep everything private so I’m probably not going to go with that option either. In fact the way I’m going to prove I am who I say I am is by revealing solid information of a different kind. It’s not exactly a secret except that Father wouldn’t have said a word about it if I wasn’t here to call him out on his bullshit.” And all at once the smiley teen turned into an older version of the young ex-assassin that they knew. His expression darkened as his steely gaze bore into his father’s challengingly.

“So… I’m confused… What did Bats do?” Steph asked eyes flickering between them as though she were watching a tennis match.

“Probably something asshole-ish like usual” Jason muttered and the green haired Damian tore his gaze away from his father to give him a conspiratorial smile.

“Right you are dear JayJay. See last night whist little me was injured, hurt and oh so trusting, Daddy dearest did the unthinkable and drugged me. Obviously little me doesn’t remember what ensued and only finds out about it in this exact moment like the rest of you.”

“Wait… what did he…” Jason started to ask frowning

The older Damian just smiled sardonically as he lifted a hand to the right side of his neck just above his clavicle, he tapped the spot twice with his index finger “Tracker” he informed them in a sing song voice laughing softly as the room exploded into chaos.  

 

* * *

    

 

It took a while for things to calm down after that because most of the room’s occupants seemed content to talk (and yell) over each other in their search for answers as the teenaged Damian just laughed, content to sit back and watch the chaos unfold from his spot perched comfortably on the kitchen benchtop.

“Enough.” Bruce finally glared them all into grudging silence, eliciting an audible snort from Jason.

“Is it really? What are you going to do old man? You can’t just …”

“To be fair” The future version of the littlest Wayne finally cut in“I would advise that you keep the tracker, little me. It’s actually pretty useful in the future and even helped save Gr…Richard’s life once or twice. So I mean it’s not a bad thing, I just think it would have been better if we had discussed it before father took matters into his own hands” 

“You can’t be serious?” Jason asked clearly itching for a fight.

“Wait… how does a tracker in you or will mini you save Dick’s life?” Steph questioned frowning causing Tim to eye them all speculatively, mind racing with all the possibilities.

“I think we’re getting off track here. B hasn’t actually confirmed that there is indeed a tracker. B? is he telling the truth?” Dick asked looking at Bruce imploringly.

“Father wouldn’t. This imposter is not me. He’s a liar and a fraud who is out to sully…”

“Yes. There is a tracker. I did put it in last night.” Bruce answered holding up a hand to cut off 13 year old Damian before his angry protests could be voiced before he turned to their guest from the future “Report. Why are you here and how did you get here?”

“Wow baba, straight to business. I mean a little small talk wouldn’t kill anybody but I know how you get at this time of night so don’t worry about it I’ve got you.” The older Damian straightened his back as he cleared his throat and began to do his best Batman impersonation “Moddate ziadi ast ke shoma ra nadideh pesar. Haletun chetor?” (Long time not see son. How are you?) He then changed his voice back to normal, slouching slightly as he answered his own question mockingly raising his voice to a higher pitch “Man Khubam mamnun, shoma chetoid?” (I am well father. how are you?) Before once again switching back “ Man khubam mamnun. Asheghetam pesar.” (I am well. I love you son.) “Asheghetam Baba.” (I love you Father)

“See that wasn’t so hard was it? We should really…”

“Damian” Bruce growled at the older boy causing him to laugh boisterously as he brushed his bright hair out of his face and jumped off the counter to stand directly in front of his father holding up his hands in surrender.

“Okay. Okay. I get it. You’ve got no time for fun or real human emotions because you’re Batman and all of that insignificant shit is in direct violation of the _Batcode – The comprehensive guide to being a world class Asshole_ Chapter 3: _To brood or not to brood that is the question._ Section five: _Always ensure that stick is permanently lodged._ Paragraph A” He paused winking at the others before continuing in his snottiest voice “One must always act like they have a stick up their ass unless trying to convince vapid socialites that they are not in fact a fully grown adult who dresses up like a bat to spend his night running around playing hide and seek with stupidly costumed supervillains instead of being an actual fucking parent. Because obviously having real and meaningful conversations with your children about their self-worth and ensuring that they don’t grow up in a hostile, negative and  honestly volatile environment – which is sure to impact how they develop and grow as people – isn’t high up on the list of activities prioritised by a billionaire philanthropist who harps on publically about creating a safe and stable environment for the children of Gotham because he doesn’t believe that applies to the children he himself took in. but then again I suppose given how long you’ve been doing this you’re well acquainted with hypocrisy right?” the teenaged Damian smiled innocently at his father who just stared back at him, face perfectly blank through the whole tirade.

“HO-LY- SHIT. That was brutal.” Jason crowed gleefully as the rest of them stood silent in shock.

“Are you done?” Bruce asked mildly, face void of expression and waited for Damian to nod (holding up a hand to stop him from making another comment) before he continued “Report. Why are you here?”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys like it.  
> Let me know what you think :)


End file.
